the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
