3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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