Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize