think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
