Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
