Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
look no pants
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
