The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.