Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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