Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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