Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
