I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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