She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Randomize
