quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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