I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize