Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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