I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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