i barfeds in our rink
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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