If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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