Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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