I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
