if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
where does the pee come out of this thing
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
