6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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