is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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