I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
