u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Randomize
