Dual....:-)
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
