You made me cry and you don't even care
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
His nipple licking is glorious
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