he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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