can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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