Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize