do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Floor bacon is actually really good
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
