i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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