...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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