You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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