i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Randomize
