Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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