she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
