I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
