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dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
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