I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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