New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Randomize
