Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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