Having a random hookup so left but love u
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
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