i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
