Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
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im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
The air was thick with penises
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How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning