Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?