everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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