the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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