He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
