i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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