Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize