i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
