yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
