I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
